Episode 151: Twelve Dispensaries, One Cage, Zero Regrets
Nicole and Dan are back from an unannounced summer sabbatical, and they have receipts. Nicole hit Aspen, Wisconsin, and San Diego. Dan drove to Michigan. Repeatedly. Buckle up.
This week: Google Maps quietly reroutes Dan onto a pitch-black back road in the middle of nowhere, where he discovers twelve pot dispensaries in a row with nothing else around them, all lit up like casinos. He also waited fifteen minutes at a McDonald's counter to order a single Diet Coke, which he got for free, so arguably he won. Meanwhile in Hurley, Wisconsin (population 1,500, strip clubs 6), Dan spots a sign advertising cage dancing next door to a taco place called The Munch, and immediately proposes a five hour road trip. Nicole's only conditions: significant others come along, and Paul is non-negotiable. She's also still waiting on her Munch t-shirt.
Then the actual topics, allegedly:
Illinois is about to require most retailers to accept cash on purchases under $500, and the gang is genuinely torn. Consumer freedom versus getting your ATM ripped out of the wall at 3am. Also settled once and for all: every cash-only business is definitely hiding something. Yes, including Dan's massage place. No, he does not want anyone touching him.
A woman sent $310,000 to a fake Kenny Chesney she met on LinkedIn, then sued the real Kenny Chesney for not stopping her. A judge has finally weighed in. Public service announcement: no celebrity is DMing you for bus fare to Springfield, Massachusetts.
A toddler on a Porter Airlines flight refused to sit down, the plane went back to the gate, everyone deplaned, and the runway curfew killed the whole flight. Dan and Nicole propose a modest solution involving financial liability and a lifetime ban for the entire family.
And in Alaska, Dan Sullivan is running against Dan Sullivan, and has been endorsed by Dan Sullivan. Nicole calls for a boxing ring. Dan calls for a blind taste test.
Plus: the World of CD-ROM in Kalamazoo, the cobbler shop mystery, why two mattress stores can face each other and both survive, and the shocking revelation that Episode 150 was recorded but never published. It's out there. Somewhere. Not Penny's boat.
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