It's the Confidentially Speaking Christmas Special! Sweet as a candy cane, cold as the North Pole, and packed with more cheesy holiday humor than you can shake Bruce Vilanch at. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all!

Vincennes is a hit at his first day on the vice squad. We cast a giant Swede and a delicious German. Both Winegardner & Zumbo have watched some stuff. And we get an update from the pastiest doughiest bastard of them all.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to your criminal activities, our film's second montage arrives and the hits just keep on coming. And that's all I have to say about that.

Excerpt from Hush-Hush Magazine, October 10, 1953: "Hello Dear Readers from your beloved publisher, The Sidster! I had to fire the write-up guy this morning for truancy after he called out sick three days in a row for a "peanut butter overdose." He is now hospitalized after I told my good buddy, Dudley Smith, to sick his newest beefy recruit on my former employee. Rumor has it the new recruit is quite the pugilist and fixed it so Mr. Jif McSkippy will have to stick to creamy nut butters for a while since his jaw is now wired shut. I suppose I could have used the column space above to publish an actual write-up for this episode rather than slander a few of LA's nuttiest citizens, but that's life in La La Land. But you didn't hear it from me. Off the record, on the QT, and very hush hush!"

Come and knock on our door. We've been waiting for you. Where we're talkin' 'bout movies with three heroes. We also do some casting along the way. Down in our rendezvous. Welcome aboard, it's love!

This episode really hits all the hot-button issues found in L.A. Confidential:

• Dolmas
• Hair removal
• Haiku
• Joe Pesce
• Superman
• Ned Beatty
• And a hallway chitchat with Jack & Ed

The fellas continue examining the fallout of Bloody Christmas. This time, we observe DA Lowe's creepy behavior from behind a two-way mirror. We cast a Washington. We stumble on a Zumbo's Obsession. And who know's what else?