In this episode, we’re hearing from Toxic Member in Toronto. Our letter today deals with a toxic community member stirring up trouble to revolt against the community manager.

To better help Toxic Member in Toronto, I invited Andrea Middleton **as my guest expert. She is a seasoned veteran of the community space who loves finding paths to productive and powerful collaborations with opinionated and skeptical communities, which is perfect for our letter today.

So, tune in for a lot of wisdom from someone who’s dealt with a toxic community member or two and some really practical tools on what to do when your community turns against you.

In this episode:

(03:34) When Andrea fanned the flames without a gameplan

(06:21) 3 strategies for conflict de-escalation

(11:57) The communitea: Toxic Member in Toronto’s letter

(15:08) How to protect yourself against toxic community members

(17:49) Having a strong code of conduct in place and tips to get there

(28:32) The diagnostic phase and possible plans of action

(34:44) Fighting fire (conflict) with a vacuum

Resources Mentioned:

❤️ Sign up for Heartbeat. Bri’s recommended all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“You don't need to agree with someone to understand where they're coming from. But without understanding her goals and motivations, you're never going to be able to form a strategic plan for how to address her behavior.“ - Andrea Middleton

“You don't need to arm yourself with all of these rigid guidelines and rules when really, as “the protector” of the community, your job is to bring forth the spirit of the community, not to just enforce the things people aren't supposed to do.“ - Bri Leever

Andrea Middleton

Andrea is a veteran community organizer who loves finding paths to productive and powerful collaborations with opinionated, skeptical communities. She spent 10 years working in community efforts in the WordPress open source project, and joined Reddit in 2021 — the last 3 years at Reddit she’s had lots of exciting moments, including working with mods and communities through the API protests of last summer. In her spare time, she loves reading sci-fi/fantasy, cooking, fine wine, and goofing with her teenagers.

🖥️ Website

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting to create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

In this episode, we’re hearing from Constrained in Columbus. Our letter deals with creating a vibrant and engaged community under the pressure of big business goals.

To better help Constrained in Columbus, I invited Jelani Memory **as my guest expert. He’s not our typical guest because he doesn't manage or really consider himself a community creator. But as you will find in this episode he has an incredible amount of insights and wisdom to share with community builders, as he essentially takes a community-centric approach to everything that he does.

So, tune in for a powerful episode that will have you rethinking how to deal with people who disagree with you, inspired to walk the walk, and ready to better connect with your community.

In this episode:

(04:47) The importance of engaging and creating bridges to make change

(10:28) Jelani’s process to help other people access their own stories

(18:28) Leading your community culture by example

(23:26) The communitea: Constrained in Columbus’s letter

(24:49) 3 principles for the caretaking of your community

(31:23) Insights into Jelani’s own acquisition experience

(34:44) Being clear and true to the mission and values of your community

Resources Mentioned:

👦 👧 Learn more about A Kids Co. at akidsco.com

❤️ Sign up for Heartbeat. Bri’s recommended all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“A community can't go further than you can take them. They will do what you do. You can say all sorts of stuff, but culture is what you do, not what you say. And they will act like you act. If you step all over people, if you try and be the most talkative person in the room, [if] you dismiss people's ideas, they will do that.“ - Jelani Memory

“[Community]'s an incredibly powerful model, especially when partnered with business and, to your point, when it's not coming from a place of authenticity and vulnerability and you setting the pace for that connection, it will crumble faster than your cookie possibly could.“ - Bri Leever

Jelani Memory

Jelani Memory is currently VP & Publisher at DK where he oversees the A Kids Book About Imprint. He's also the founder of A Kids Co., a groundbreaking media company that empowers children and families through meaningful and inclusive content. Awarded the Eleanor Roosevelt Bravery in Literature Award, Jelani previously co-founded Circle (the parental control app, NOT the community platform) and has revolutionized children's publishing by tackling important topics like systemic racism, self-love, and climate change.

🖥️ Website

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting to create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

In this episode, the inspiration stems from a late-night LinkedIn DM from a distressed community manager handling a tumultuous Discord community. They felt overwhelmed and discouraged by all the suggestions and criticism constantly comming from community members.

To better help Discordant on Discord, I invited Ami Defesche as my guest expert. Ami is a community builder with a passion for helping dreamers and doers in small business. She's currently the community director at Wildcard Alliance — and formerly at Intuit and Blackbaud.

As an experienced community builder, Ami shared strategies and tools for managing overwhelming feedback and toxic behavior in rapidly expanding communities. So, tune in to learn about the importance of mission statements, setting boundaries, and self-care practices for community managers.

In this episode:

(03:01) The Communitea: Discordant on Discord’s letter

(04:43) The Challenges of Managing a Discord Community

(06:15) Strategies for Managing Community Feedback

(12:48) Tools and Techniques for Community Moderation

(20:29) What to Do if You’re Starting a Discord Community Today

(23:52) Self-Care for Community Managers

Resources Mentioned:

❤️ Sign up for Heartbeat. Bri’s recommended all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“If you're going to start a community anywhere, start as best as you can with the thought that one day it's going to have 10, 000 people in it […] What would you want in place to make sure that was a productive group?” - Ami Defesche

“You have quite a bit of agency as the moderator, as the community manager to set the framework for how members behave in this space and what you expect of them.“ - Bri Leever

“My dad always said: ‘avoid creating a policy where what’s required is a hard conversation.’” - Bri Leever

Ami Defesche

Ami Defesche is a community builder with a passion for helping the dreamers and doers in small business. Currently the Community Director at Wildcard Alliance, formerly Intuit and Blackbaud.

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting to create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Welcome to The Dear Bri Podcast, an advice column for community conundrums, fiascos, and drama. In this episode, we’re hearing from Frazzled Fairy-Marketing-Godmother. Our letter today comes from someone who clearly has a big heart for their community, but is also really struggling to draw boundaries.

To better help Frazzled Fairy-Marketing-Godmother, I invited Taylor Harrington — Head of Community at Groove— as my guest expert. I knew this letter would be perfect for Taylor because this is a topic we’ve discussed often behind the scenes as community builders.

So, tune in for a remarkable episode as we talk about making tough calls and standing by them, some awesome practical ideas for how to create boundaries to protect your time and energy, releasing the identity of the community leader who has to be everything for everyone, and much more.

In this episode:

(03:56) Taylor’s dicey sunset scenario

(11:41) Bri’s worst leadership failure

(15:31) The communitea: Frazzled Fairy-Marketing-Godmother’s letter

(18:25) Boundaries for ourselves, coworkers, and community members

(23:32) The cost of saying yes to something

(29:37) Shifting away from the identity of being the person who's there for everyone

(32:46) The importance of establishing boundaries upfront

(35:00) The “Yes, and/No, but” concept

(39:50) The secret ingredient for asserting boundaries

(42:19) Giving yourself grace and being willing to pivot

Resources Mentioned:

🙌 Ready to start Grooving and building meaningful relationships from home? Use the code BRILEEVER for 30 days free on Groove.

❤️ Sign up for Heartbeat. Bri’s favorite all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“When you are someone who loves to run an experiment and try new things, and not commit to it being something that's going to happen forever, that means that you're going to fail. Things are going to flop. Things are going to be learning moments that you weren't expecting.“ - Taylor Harrington

“ In community work, going above and beyond… there are certain seasons for it, I will say, but as a practice, it's unsustainable.“ - Bri Leever

Taylor Harrington:

Taylor is a big fan of board games, bookstores, running, hosting gatherings, and finding new Airbnbs to visit. She lives in NYC and is the Head of Community at Groove, the online coworking community for people who work from home and whose work doesn't fit into a neat little box.

🖥️ Website

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever:

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting to create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Welcome to The Dear Bri Podcast, an advice column for community conundrums, fiascos, and drama. In this episode, we’re hearing from Crumbling in Kansas. Our letter today comes from a community manager in the thick of a complete overhaul for the type of community they run. And it has to do with the tension between a cohort-based model and a membership model.

To better help Crumbling in Kansas, I invited Marie Schacht — CEO of Akimbo— as my guest expert. I thought of Marie because back when everyone was just starting to create online courses, Marie, Seth Godin, and the team at Akimbo were trailblazers in the education-centric community design space, specifically for the cohort-based model.

So, tune in for a special episode as we cover a wide variety of topics from the high-level mindset and curiosity with which we must continue to approach community building, all the way down to some of the really practical experiments that Marie is conducting to figure out what the future of learning looks like online and especially in community.

In this episode:

(04:06) Marie’s computer meltdown

(08:44) The communitea: a letter from Crumbling in Kansas

(15:29) The strengths of the cohort-based model

(18:54) The benefits of the membership model

(21:20) Which model is best for you based on your marketing engine

(25:11) Test and experiment before the community model transition

(29:27) Discuss with leadership the vision, mission, and values behind a community strategy transition

(37:07) Trends in the online learning community space

(42:05) Practical community experiments that Marie is conducting

(45:11) Listening to your community and embracing the third option

Resources Mentioned:

❤️ Signup for Heartbeat. Bri’s recommended all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“That is leadership. Going and having a discussion and owning your feelings and what you're not feeling totally sure about is a huge leadership skill. And if it were someone on my team, and I was that CEO making that decision, I would want them to come have that conversation with me.” - Marie Schacht

“Don't do it alone. Community building is hard enough. There's no reason to do it alone.“ - Bri Leever

Marie Schacht:

Marie is the CEO of Akimbo, a company founded in 2015 by Seth Godin. She's designed and run more than 100+ community-centered workshops, courses and trainings. Both online and in-person ranging from a few hours to 200+ days.

🖥️ Website

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever:

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Welcome to The Dear Bri Podcast, an advice column for community conundrums, fiascos, and drama. In this episode, we’re hearing from Anxious in Atlanta. Our letter today deals with a private networking community. Our letter writer ran a test and now they are wondering how to go from this one-year discovery phase into their launch.

To better help Anxious in Atlanta, I invited Evan Hamilton — Director of Community at Hubspot — as my guest expert. He is sharing his strategy, thought process, and takeaways from being in the community industry for over a dozen years.

So, tune in to the many golden nuggets about community building and strategy coming your way as we talk about regrets, testing and experimenting, the importance of connection, and much more.

In this episode:

(07:04) The communitea: Anxious in Atlanta’s letter

(08:05) How to test your community concept

(13:58) Questions to ask when in the discovery phase

(17:17) Connection as magic that leads to an outcome

(21:38) 3 ways to shift member expectations and monetize your community

(27:20) How to curate a community for the right people

(31:03) The ongoing discovery phase

Resources Mentioned:

📕 Check out the book Evan mentions: Predictably Irrational by Dan Ariely.

📩 Subscribe to Evan’s Newsletter Community Manager Breakfast.

❤️ Signup for Heartbeat. Bri’s recommended all-in-one community platform.

💛 Join Ember. The place for go-getter community creators building community-powered businesses.

Noteworthy quotes:

“I think if there's one piece of advice I could give to every community builder, it's: experiment. You should be testing things before you build.“ - Evan Hamilton

“At the end of the day, especially if the community is going to be a significant offer in your business, the most important test you can run is: “Are people willing to pay for it?” And the only way you can really run that test is to ask them to pay for it.“ - Bri Leever

Evan Hamilton

Evan has been building communities professionally for over 15 years at companies like HubSpot, Reddit, and Nextdoor. He has run everything from forums to conferences to global meetup programs and volunteer moderator programs with tens of thousands of members.

🖥️ Website

📱 Linkedin

Bri Leever

Bri got her start building a community and growing it to a multi-million dollar revenue stream for a social enterprise in Portland, OR. Now, she supports folks used to running their business on content, coaching, and consulting to create their community offer. She's a Community Strategist by day and a Campervan host by night on the Big Island of Hawaii and you'll usually find her on, in, or under the water.

🖥️ Website

📩 Newsletter

📹 Youtube

📱 Linkedin

And before you go…

💜 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts

💚 Leave a review on Spotify

That helps the podcast more than you know and I deeply appreciate it. 🙏

Want your story to be next? Submit an anonymous letter about your community conundrum, fiasco, drama, or other dilemma here.

*Dear Bri is produced by Ideablossoms.

Hosted by Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.