This is my first ever "Short-isode", a shorter format episode that I did quickly. Please forgive me.

Okay, okay, I'm behind. I tried to to reach for the sun and got burned. Luckily, I managed to get this together, so all hope is not lost. I promise I'll do better next time. Until then, this peace offering about weird taxes, and weird political promises, plus MUSIC!

The next full episode about the book "American Carnage" by Tim Alberta, will be up very soon.

Here are the lyrics to the song "American Carnage" (American decay):

"From the ashes of Bush, the ratings slung low, Obama rose up, and stole the whole show G-O-P party's in ruins, no vision, no fight Their base fell asleep and has been there all night.

[PRE-CHORUS] Bombs away, by progress on display, Change hit the right like a brick to the face. Factions at war, blood on the walls, A billonaire bullshitter grabbed them by the balls

[CHORUS] American Carnage, for American decay, Marching to the edge, to throw it all away American Carnage, it’s a G-O-P ride No place to run—no place to hide.

[VERSE] Jordan and Cruz on absolutist fire, Boehner and Mitch try to hold the line. Coups and clashes, the rhetoric like acid, That's it! Impotence grew, and the base got flaccid.

[PRE-CHORUS] Bombs away, on progress on display, Change hit the right, like a brick to the face. Factions at war, blood on the walls, A billonaire bullshitter grabbed them by the balls

[VERSE] On a golden escalator, came a golden clown, He tore them to shit, and burned their house down. Trillion-dollar debt for a nationalist jerk-off, Morals and family values are sold off

[CHORUS] American Carnage, for American decay, Marching to the edge, to throw it all away American Carnage, it’s a G-O-P ride No place to run—no place to hide.

[BRIDGE] Muslim bans, walls, and the families torn, The old guard’s dead, now the new breed’s born. Cultural shifts, tech disrupts, America’s soul ripped and fucked up.

[BREAKDOWN] How did we get here? Do we survive? Is this a death rattle, Are we alive? Decades of division, resentment, and greed, The roots of the party now strangled by sleaze.

[CHORUS] American Carnage, for American decay, Marching to the edge, to throw it all away American Carnage, it’s a G-O-P ride No place to run—no place to hide.

[OUTRO] It’s American Carnage, (AMERICAN CARNAGE!) Our American Carnage (AMERICAN CARNAGE!) We won't get very far with...(AMERICAN CARNAGE!) We'll all have to live with...(AMERICAN CARNAGE!)"

APOLOGIES SECTION (The following section is reserved to apologize to the numerous people, places, and things Elton offended in this episode.): Oral sex, punk rock, elephants, people expecting whole episodes, people who dislike unintelligible lyrics in songs, etc.

A special thanks to Jenna Fischer and Diedrich Bader

Dating in the age of the internet is a weird endeavor. All of the indulgence of endless choices, and the anxiety of communicating with people rolled into one. What's a single person to do? Luckily, comedian Aziz Ansari wrote a book about it and Elton is here to talk about it. Does that help you find that special someone in this sea of misfit toys? Maybe? Elton's no "love doctor," but he is awkward enough for everyone involved. Listen to this episode and get a wild ride through modern dating, and some tips on how to improve your odds!

GET THE BOOK HERE!--> Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari

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The following section is reserved for the people, places, things, and more that Elton probably offended in this episode--

THE APOLOGIES SECTION: The LGBTQ+ community, mouth fingering fetishists, the English language, sociologists, dating, God, people living in apartment buildings, etc.

A special thanks to Diedrich Bader and Jenna Fischer for all their inspiration.

Okay, so, I got a little overzealous with my first attempt at this trailer...and I uploaded it without making sure everything was up to snuff. So, I'm re-doing it. Not gonna lie, it's not the first time I've released prematurely, and it won't be the last, I'm sure.