Many survivors of domestic violence don’t realize they’re being abused until years have passed. They convince themselves it’s something else—a bad day at work, a short temper, too much to drink or deep-seated childhood wounds that therapy might heal. They hold onto hope that things will change. But then, a pattern emerges—unrelenting, undeniable. Promises are broken, help doesn’t stick and sobriety doesn’t bring peace.

Joan was one of those survivors. For nearly a decade, she rationalized her husband Michael’s behavior. It wasn’t until the night he came after their family with a knife that Joan knew she had to escape. She got out, saving herself and her two children, but what came next was just as harrowing: a court system that refused to protect her. Instead, it turned the blame on her.

This episode highlights Joan’s story and introduces the Family Violence Appellate Project, a nonprofit that helps survivors appeal unjust court decisions in California and Washington.

We want to hear from you. Do you have a story we need to discuss or a guest we should feature? Visit us at ToxicThePodcast.com and share your story.

If you’re experiencing abuse or domestic violence, please reach out to someone you trust. You can also connect with a trained advocate near you through DomesticShelters.org.

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