Is it Tottenham’s fault that people call 2-0 a dangerous scoreline? Today, even Jim admits to Marcus and Pete that he has some sympathy for Spurs fans after they gave up a 2-0 lead against Brighton.

Elsewhere, Adama Traoré gets the Nathan Redmond treatment after he broke London speed limits against Man City on Saturday. Plus, Andy Carroll is doing King and Country proud over in France. One last England call-up? Who says no…

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After the Emirates began to empty out despite Arsenal’s 2-0 lead over PSG, should fans who leave early be called out for their disloyalty? Or should we all just stop whining about it? Luke, Andy, and Vish tackle one of football’s big taboos.

Elsewhere, with the old guard of managers almost completely gone (just you left now, Dychey), have managerial mind games become a thing of the past?

Plus, why are more players returning to their old clubs and what are our favourite football noises? No, Gary Neville’s orgasm doesn’t count...

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Could Pete kick through a door? That’s the big question that he poses to Luke, Andy and Vish on today’s podcast.

Elsewhere, Andy also finds some time to explain why Man United won’t sack Erik ten Hag just yet and Luke backs the decision to call up Dominic Solanke to the England squad. Plus, Pete is forced into discussing Only Fools and Horses The Musical.

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And to mark the occasion Pete and Luke are sniffing some mysterious minty white powder. IT’S MENTHOL, ALL RIGHT!

They discuss that Jhon Durán goal, that Emi Martínez save, and whether this was the greatest night in Villa’s history since Steve Bruce had that cabbage thrown at his head.

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Arsenal could only manage a 2-0 win at home to PSG. Pathetic. Today, Pete, Vish and Jim (mainly Pete) are here to question why Arsenal weren’t able to despatch this new woke incarnation of PSG by at least four goals, like the mighty Newcastle did last season.

Elsewhere, Pete questions whether everyone in the world named Nuri Şahin is extremely handsome. Plus, Charlie Kane appears to have been sourcing some new brand deals for Harry. You can’t keep a good man down…

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Bournemouth beat Southampton 3-1, which means Southampton are still languishing near the bottom of the table. Just how Luke likes it…

Today, he and Jim take a look at Southampton and question how much time Russell Martin has left in the job. Graham Potter loitering in the Sky studio like a vulture probably isn't helping. Speaking of which, Luke explains which Sky presenter is a “poor man’s Gary Cotterill”. A damning comparison!

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We are gathered here today to help our friend Vithushan Ehantharajah whose football team has fallen on hard times. Please take a moment to think of Vish.

Moment over. Today, Luke, Jim and Vish analyse Tottenham’s decision to cash in their Man United voucher this weekend. Plus, Luke declares that James Justin’s goal at Arsenal is the goal of the season so far and we agree that it’s best to keep José Mourinho at a safe distance after some more timeless shithousery from the special one.

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Marcus, Luke and Jim discuss whether the dark arts are becoming more common in modern football. Why are we answering that question now, you ask? Well, no reason…

Plus, which players would we like to bring out of retirement and what should the punishment be for managers leaving their technical area? Come join us!

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