Vampires suck. And thank goodness they do.

Complicated creatures full of flaws: no mirrors means bad hair days. Fangs make dentist visits tough. And they can’t eat stake.

But today's vampires have plenty to love: immortality, shape shifting, badassery and power. More often than not, they’re totally sexy.

Think snake-necklaced Salma Hayek. Long-locked, pastel-suited Gary Oldman. Kate Beckinsale cling-wrapped for your pleather.

But talk about a glow-up! Before Bram Stoker’s Dracula, stories and folktales showed vampires as stinking, filthy, peasants (no class judgment here – vampires just had these qualities). They came from the smallest villages, in the most rural communities.

How, in 500 years, did vampires transition from The Stinking Vampyr of Pentsch, to sparkle-chested Edward “I only eat woodland creatures” Cullen?

Well, immortality leaves plenty of time for a glow up.

Today: The real history of vampires. Or, the history of Real Vampires.

Let’s Get Shocked.

RESOURCES

• Vampires in the Sefer Hasidim: https://www.torahmusings.com/2011/10/vampires-and-witches-in-sefer-hasidim/
• Estries in the Sefer Hasidim: https://templeofmiriam.com/blog/sefer-hasidim-alukah-and-estries?srsltid=AfmBOoqUuIm990DKfyPMeleYKIhD-zsrkB_FX9akdWHyZlxnx5L6eq2A

Johannes Cuntius

• https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/sk53s8NGr6znMccN8xpSNM/nine-fangtastic-facts-about-european-vampire-literature
• https://occult-world.com/cuntius-johannes-pentsch-vampire/

JIANGSHI (Chinese Hopping Vampire) CLIPS

Encounters of the Spooky Kind: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTD9cVr2naM

Mr. Vampire II: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xt8nC4rRc0U

Mr. Vampire IV: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ASFhUsFOio

Henry More: An Antidote Against Atheism

• https://archive.org/details/antidoteagainsta00more/mode/2up

Who’s got two swords and went from poor fisher woman to pirate Queen in less than a decade?

Today, Zing ‘N’ Jolts set sail for the early 1800s to track the facts on a woman who truly defied the patriarchal society of her birth. For young girls growing up in a poor fish village, there were two options: stay where you are, or sex work as a means of upward mobility (err…horizontal mobility?).

Today’s heroine took the second option, and boy did she use it to jump the ranks. Becoming internationally renowned for her efforts above a Flower Boat, she seduced a pirate king and – when he died – took over the biggest pirate armada to ever sail.

Today: Booty & Junk: The Life and Crimes of Zheng Yi Sao. Let’s get shocked!

Resources

• Mr. Glasspoole and the Chinese Pirates https://collections.britishart.yale.edu/catalog/orbis:810058

• Pirates of the South China Coast, 1790 – 1810, by Dian H. Murray

• A narrative of the captivity and sufferings of John Turner ... among the Ladrones or pirates, on the coast of China showing the manners and customs of the natives ... in the year 1807

Jolts and Zing dive into the life, loves, and art of the iconic Frida Kahlo (1907 – 1954). The renowned Mexican painter, celebrated for her feminism, indigenous fashion, and relentlessly personal artistic vision, has become ubiquitous in pop culture. But beyond the headlines of her work and chronic pain, lie incredible – and startling – details.

Today: Frida Kahlo. Let’s Get Shocked.

Warnings: Strong Language, adult themes including graphic violence, sex, miscarriage, and communism.

Resources

• Museo de Frida Kahlo: https://www.museofridakahlo.org.mx/?lang=en
• Frida Kahlo: An Open Life, by Raquel Tibol. https://books.google.com/books?id=HJaFg3S7AZQC&q
• FRIDA: A Biography of Frida Kahlo, by Hayden Herrera

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Created, Written and Co-hosted by Daniel Berger-Jones and John J King.

Produced and Edited by Kenneth Fuentes.