It's our season finale! This season we talked a lot about how men and women are different-- from how we express ourselves to how we receive feedback. One thing is clear from our previous episodes: when women and men don’t understand our differences we struggle in relationships because friction is inevitable.

Though men and women are different, I think we need each other. That is oftentimes difficult to see with so many women advocating for equality and taking on the head of household role. In this episode we discuss the harmonious roles that men and women can play in each others’ lives, why we need each other, and how we both possess the masculine and feminine energies needed to balance and complement each other.

I also share my thoughts from an independent, unmarried woman’s perspective and we dig into how difficult it can be for independent women to find a complementary balance with men or even recognize when an imbalance exists. We discuss why self-sufficient women have a harder time dating, how men are turned off by that independence, and on the flip side how some women are trained or taught to date and marry. 

We hope you enjoy this episode. If you do, let other people know by writing us a review and rating our podcast with five stars on Apple. If you haven’t already, check out the rest of Season 3, and don’t forget to subscribe so you won’t miss future episodes! 

Also, check us out on social media to continue the conversation.

@GirlTalkWithPops on IG

GTWP on FB

In this episode:

[07:27] - In coming generations, Pops thinks that women will assume the “the head of household” role. 

[08:46] - Though, they often talk about how men and women are different, Brittney clarifies that one is not better than the other. 

[10:38] - Brittney thinks that unfortunately a lot of black women have been forced (voluntarily or involuntarily) to take care of themselves and their families alone, but realizes she doesn’t want to perpetuate that cycle. 

[11:53] - Men and women need each other. We’re meant to balance each other. However, for some reason, we’re sometimes afraid to admit that we need each other.

[12:39] - Pops thinks that a clean slate and open-mindedness are key to achieving balance and understanding in a relationship. Old ways of doing things won’t work.

[14:06] - As creatures of habit, Brittney thinks that this is where doing the work in relationships comes in.

[16:29] - Brittney shares an example of when the heart (emotion) and the head (rational thinking) work in unison to complement each other in a family.  

[18:34] - Pops acknowledges that Brittney possesses masculine and feminine energies. In a relationship, he suggests each person clarifies the role they want to play in order to achieve balance. 

[23:52] - Pops says that it’s a turn-off when women claim “I don’t need a man”.

[25:55] - Brittney has a theory that men don’t really want to be in a relationship with super independent women. Pops thinks that it’s too challenging for men. 

[26:46] - Pops has been in a relationship with an independent woman where he felt like it couldn’t bring anything satisfactory to the table. Brittney thinks that men want to be in relationships where they feel needed. 

[32:04] - Brittney realizes that she wasn’t necessarily taught how to be a partner or to be in a relationship. She was raised to be independent, while other women are taught how to play the game.

[34:31] - How do we break the cycle of non-partnership? How do teach children that men and women needing and complementing each other is ok and good?

GTWP Website

We can give off the wrong impression sometimes, and some of us more often than others.  I’ve been told I’m nonchalant or unfazed, and it can come across to other people the wrong way. Even when I’m trying to be more expressive, I don’t think I demonstrate it as strongly as I think I do. 

It does lead to an interesting topic of conversation, though. Today, Pops and I talk about sensitivity among men and women, which of the sexes is more expressive, and how men need to feel appreciated. But the real meat of our discussion surrounds why men and women express feelings differently and how society conditions us to adhere to emotional stereotypes, even from childhood. 

If you enjoy what you hear today, let other people know by writing us a review and rating our podcast on Apple with five stars. Also, make sure you hit the subscribe button so you won’t miss a single episode!

In this episode:

[03:09] - How would Pops describe Brittney’s demeanor?

[05:20] - Brittney describes herself as even-keeled but this demeanor confuses other people sometimes.

[07:08] - Brittney asks Pops who he thinks is more sensitive: men or women?

[09:30] - Are women more expressive than men?

[10:08] - Guys want acknowledgment of the good deeds they do instantly.

[13:47] - Pops shares the secret for women to act more appreciative towards men.

[16:02] - Brittney has a theory for why men end up with trophy wives.

[17:35] - What do women and Clark Kent have in common?

[22:36] - Men are more likely to express negative feelings often correlated with being a protector and provider such as contempt or anger.

[24:52] - We learn gendered expectations and have them ingrained in us as children.

[27:29] - When boys participate in sports these days, everyone’s considered a winner. That can have an unexpected downside for men going forward.

[28:22] - Men, statistically speaking, are more competitive than women and it shows in the workplace.

[32:13] - Are we being set up for a more equal society between men and women in the future?

[34:30] - Sometimes when men don’t express their emotions, it can come out in unhealthy ways.

Links and Resources:

Girl Talk With Pops

@GirlTalkWithPops on Instagram

Girl Talk With Pops on Facebook

Girl Talk With Pops on Apple Podcasts

I have this theory that men don’t like to be challenged. I’ve found myself asking men questions that make them uncomfortable. Not sure if it has been because they’re not expecting them or ready to answer, but some of my questions have caused men to shut down conversations I’ve tried to start. 

What’s at the root of it, though? In today’s episode, I discuss this with Pops and relate it back to the book I mentioned last week in episode 11. We talk about how differently men and women perceive unsolicited advice and approach problem-solving. We also touch on how growing older or getting deeper into the relationship can give you a new, more mature perspective of it all.

We hope you enjoy what you hear today. If you do, let other people know by writing us a review and rating our podcast on Apple with five stars. And if you haven’t already, make sure you hit the subscribe button so you won’t miss a single episode!

In this episode:

[02:22] - Brittney asks Pops about how she challenges him.

[04:52] - When faced with tough or uncomfortable questions, men who seem to shut down just aren’t ready to face their truth.

[07:41] - Brittney shares where she believes she’s found issues in her communications with men.

[08:47] - Brittney gives Pops an example to determine how he’d feel getting unsolicited advice from a lady friend.

[14:37] - Does Pops agree that men’s modus operandi is to offer solutions?

[16:42] - Women can ask men questions in the wrong way. Painting it as “I” versus “we” makes a difference.

[18:17] - Sometimes women just want to vent their problems without the need for men to present solutions.

[19:49] - Brittney reveals the eye-opening revelation she had about her approach to asking challenging questions.

[21:40] - There’s a technique in relationships to re-frame how to approach advising men in a way that doesn’t put them on the defense.

[25:49] - Men only want advice when they ask for it. Pops emphasizes this with a simple, everyday example.

[29:37] - In time, partners don’t have to work as much on adjusting to each other in their relationship.

[32:29] - Some people don’t recognize their problem or issue, and that’s the bigger problem.

Links and Resources:

Summary of Men are From Mars, Women Are From Venus by John Gray

Girl Talk With Pops

@GirlTalkWithPops on Instagram

Girl Talk With Pops on Facebook

Girl Talk With Pops on Apple Podcasts