Hey, Friend!

What are you tolerating right now that is costing you?

Maybe it's a person who consistently oversteps.

A team member who isn't carrying their share.

A situation you've been hoping will change.

A conversation you've been avoiding.

A calendar that has no room left in it.

A responsibility you've taken on because “it's just easier if I do it myself.”

Or maybe it's a pattern in yourself that you've been putting up with for far too long.

We all tolerate things.

Sometimes that's wisdom. Not everything needs to be confronted or changed.

But sometimes we're tolerating something because addressing it feels harder than living with it.

And there's a cost.

In this week's episode we're taking a closer look at the hidden price of what we allow to continue.

Because the cost isn't always obvious.

It might be costing you:

• Time

• Energy

• Peace

• Trust

• Joy

• Credibility

• Your best people

• Your ability to lead well

I call it the tolerance tax.

And here's the question I want you to consider:

Don't just ask what it will cost you to change. Ask what it will cost you if you don't.

I pray this blesses you,

Becky

Hey, Friend!

In this week’s episode, we’re talking about Stop Asking “What Should I Do?” Ask This Instead.

We’ll explore what happens when we:

• Take responsibility for things that belong to other people

• Confuse caring with fixing

• Try to make everyone happy with our decisions

• Carry outcomes we can't control

• Ask other people to make decisions that are really ours to make

• And struggle to trust God with the things that aren't ours to carry

Here's a question to take with you this week:

What is mine to do—and what is mine to release?

Because you don't have to fix everything you notice.

You don't have to carry everyone you love.

You don't have to make everyone happy.

And you don't have to solve the whole problem today.

Sometimes you simply need to discern the next faithful step.

What is mine to do?

I pray this blesses you,

Becky

Hey, Friend,

What if changing your mind isn't a sign of weak leadership?

What if it's a sign that you're growing?

As leaders, we often celebrate decisiveness, confidence, conviction, and consistency. And those are good qualities.

But sometimes we take them too far.

We become afraid to reconsider a decision because we don't want people to think we were wrong.

We defend a position simply because we've already taken it.

We confuse consistency with integrity.

And we forget that sometimes the wisest thing a leader can say is:

“I've changed my mind.”

In this week's episode of Leadership Becomes Her, we're talking about The Courage to Change Your Mind.

We'll explore:

• Why changing our minds can feel like admitting weakness

• The difference between wisdom and indecisiveness

• Why secure leaders can admit when they're wrong

• How refusing to reconsider can damage trust

• What new information, experience, and perspective can teach us

• And what our faith has to say about humility, listening, and being willing to grow

Here's a question I want you to consider:

Am I more committed to being right—or to doing what is right?

Because you don't have to defend yesterday's decision simply because you made it yesterday.

You are allowed to learn.

You are allowed to grow.

You are allowed to see something differently.

And you are allowed to change course.

That's not weak leadership.

That's courageous leadership.

I pray this blesses you,

Becky

What if “I don’t know” is good leadership?

There are three words that can be surprisingly difficult for a leader to say:

I don’t know.

We often assume that good leaders have answers. We’re supposed to know what to do, what comes next, why something happened, and how to fix it.

And for women in leadership, there can be an added pressure to prove that we belong by being competent, prepared, and capable.

But what if saying “I don’t know” isn’t a sign of weak leadership?

What if it can actually be a sign of confidence?

In this week’s episode of Leadership Becomes Her, I’m talking about The Art of Saying “I Don’t Know.”

We’ll explore:

• Why leaders can feel pressured to always have the answer

• The difference between confidence and certainty

• How admitting what you don’t know can actually build trust

• When “I don’t know” is humility—and when it becomes an excuse

• How to invite others into leadership instead of pretending to have all the answers

• And what our willingness to not know has to do with faith

Because the truth is, you don’t have to know everything to lead well.

You can say, “I don’t know yet.”

You can say, “Let’s figure it out together.”

And sometimes, you can simply say, “I don’t know what God is doing—but I trust Him.”

That isn't weakness.

It may be one of the most honest—and courageous—things a leader can say.

Listen to this week’s episode of Leadership Becomes Her: The Art of Saying “I Don’t Know.”

And then ask yourself:

Where am I pretending to know because I’m afraid of what people will think if I don’t?

Becky

Hey, Friend!

Throughout The Lie series, we've exposed six lies that Christian leaders can quietly believe:

I have to say yes to everyone.

My worth comes from my work.

Everyone has to like me.

I can rest when everything is finished.

More ministry means more faithfulness.

If I were better, this wouldn't be so hard.

And underneath all of them is a similar message:

Try harder. Do more. Be better. Prove yourself.

But the gospel offers us something very different.

You don't have to prove your worth.

You don't have to earn God's love.

You don't have to meet every need.

You don't have to be liked by everyone.

You don't have to do everything.

And you don't have to become a better version of yourself before God can work through you.

Jesus invites weary and burdened people to come to Him and receive rest.

Lie: If I were better, this wouldn't be so hard.

Truth: Hard doesn't mean I'm failing.

Maybe you're not failing.

Maybe you're growing.

Maybe you're grieving.

Maybe you're learning.

Maybe you're carrying something heavy.

Maybe you're simply in a hard season.

And maybe God isn't asking you to become someone else before you can be faithful.

Maybe He's inviting you to bring your whole, imperfect, sometimes-tired, sometimes-confused self to Him.

You can be human and faithful at the same time.

And remember:

Leadership isn't just about what you accomplish. It's about who you're becoming.

I pray this blesses you,

Becky

Hey, Friend!

For many Christian leaders, "more" can become an almost invisible measure of faithfulness.

More ministry.

More people helped.

More programs.

More opportunities.

More hours.

More responsibility.

And when we look at our calendars and see that we're doing less than we could be doing, we can begin to wonder:

Am I really being faithful?

But here's the problem: there will always be more ministry to do.

In this episode, we're challenging the lie that more ministry automatically means more faithfulness—and discovering a better question:

God, what are You actually asking me to do?

Not every need is your assignment.

Not every opportunity is your calling.

Not everything that is good is something God is asking you to carry.

Timing matters. Something can be a wonderful opportunity and still not be your assignment in this season.

This week, when a new opportunity comes your way, resist the urge to answer immediately.

Instead, ask:

Is it good? Is it mine? Is it mine now?

Then give yourself permission to say no to something good if it keeps you available for something God has actually entrusted to you.

Lie: Faithfulness is measured by how much I do.

Truth: Faithfulness is measured by how faithfully I do what God has actually given me to do.

And remember: leadership isn't just about what you accomplish. It's about who you're becoming.

I pray this blesses you,

Becky

Hey, Friend!

When will you finally allow yourself to rest?

After the next project?

After the big event?

After the crisis is over?

After everyone else has what they need?

After you finally get caught up?

Here's the problem: the work will never be finished.

There will always be another email. Another meeting. Another person who needs you. Another problem that needs solving.

So if you believe rest is something you earn after the work is done, you may never rest at all.

In this episode, we're exposing a lie that many Christian leaders quietly believe:

I can rest when everything is finished.

We'll look at the way Jesus modeled rhythms of work, withdrawal, prayer, and rest—even when there were still people who needed Him. In Mark 6, Jesus actually invited His exhausted disciples to come away with Him and rest. Rest wasn't a reward for finishing their ministry. It was part of how He taught them to live and lead.

And we'll ask a deeper question:

What do you believe will happen if you stop?

Because sometimes our resistance to rest isn't really about our calendars. It's about identity, control, guilt, or the belief that everything depends on us.

I pray this blesses you!

Becky

Hey, Friend!

Have you ever walked away from a conversation and replayed it in your head?

Did I say the wrong thing?

Is she upset with me?

What does he think of me now?

Maybe you find yourself apologizing when you haven't actually done anything wrong. Maybe you avoid difficult conversations because you don't want anyone to be disappointed in you. Or maybe criticism hits you harder than it should because, somewhere underneath it all, you believe that if someone doesn't like you, something must be wrong with you.

Welcome to one of the most subtle lies Christian leaders can believe:

Everyone has to like me.

The problem isn't that we care about people. We should. Jesus calls us to love people, listen well, speak truth in love, and pursue healthy relationships.

The problem comes when someone else's approval becomes necessary for our sense of security.

In this episode, we'll look at what happens when Christian leaders confuse being Christlike with being universally liked—and what freedom looks like when we no longer need everyone's approval.

I pray this blesses you!

Becky