High-conflict exes, clashing house rules and an ours baby — today’s episode goes deep into the reality of stepfamily life. If you’re a stepmum feeling overwhelmed, anxious or alone, this one will speak straight to you.

Katie talks with Jane (name changed), a stepmum navigating secrecy for safety, court cases, three stepchildren, and a new baby, all while trying to build a stable home anchored in values and routines. Jane shares how belonging grows slowly, how she built trust through small consistent cues (hair plaits, dinners together, practical help), and how she learned to hold boundaries without absorbing the emotion of hostile messages.

They explore loyalty binds, two-home rules, the pressure of a contact schedule that takes every weekend, and the emotional load of loving someone with a complicated history.

In this episode:

• Loving your partner and the past they carry
• Secrecy, safety and contact from a distance
• Gradual attachment to stepchildren
• Belonging cues (plaits, shared meals, helping)
• Clashing values across two homes
• Living by a custody schedule + protecting couple time
• Boundaries with a hostile ex
• Sharing hard truths with kids
• Welcoming an ours baby + forming new identity

Perfect for:
Stepmums in high-conflict situations • overwhelmed by instability • new stepmums • anyone struggling with boundaries, anxiety or slow-growing attachment.

The Stepmum Reset Workshop
Feel clearer, calmer and more in control.
👉 Book now: stepmumspace.com

Prefer self-paced? See all workbooks under All Products on the site.

To join the Stepmum Space Workshop visit www.stepmumspace.com

Support the show

Send us a text

Book your place on The Stepmum Reset now: https://stepmumspace.com

Episode Summary

In this episode, Katie talks to Claire — an independent woman who fell deeply in love with her partner… and his three children. While Claire adores the kids, navigating the dynamic with their mum and the emotional load of stepfamily life has been far harder than she expected.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, out of control, or unsure where your boundaries should be, this conversation will make you feel truly seen.

In this episode, Katie and Claire explore:

• loving the kids but finding dynamics with their mum difficult
• biting your tongue more than anyone realises
• losing yourself while trying to hold everything together
• feeling like your life is shaped by other people’s decisions
• the emotional toll of being endlessly flexible
• why boundaries aren’t optional for stepmums
• how to reconnect with yourself when everything feels chaotic

A raw, validating conversation every stepmum will relate to.

Key Topics

• feeling out of control
• high-conflict or tense co-parenting dynamics
• silent emotional load
• boundaries when you’re not the biological parent
• resentment, guilt, overwhelm and burnout
• staying grounded and connected to yourself

The Stepmum Reset Workshop

If you’re thinking, “I can’t keep going like this,” The Stepmum Reset is for you.

This two-part workshop gives you the tools, language, boundaries and clarity to feel more in control.

Next dates:
26th November and 6th December
7:15–8:45pm UK Time
Live on Zoom
Small group, compassionate, safe

You’ll leave with:

• a personalised wellbeing and boundary plan
• tools that ease overwhelm
• clarity on what’s yours to hold — and what isn’t
• strategies for asking for what you need
• a community of women who truly get it

Book your place: https://stepmumspace.com

Or email: katie@stepmumspace.com

Perfect For

• overwhelmed stepmums
• women drained by the ex-partner dynamic
• stepmums struggling with boundaries
• high-conflict co-parenting situations
• those feeling anxious, invisible or resentful
• new stepmums needing validation and reassurance

Helpful Links

The Stepmum Reset: https://stepmumspace.com

Instagram: @stepmumspace
1:1 and Couples Coaching: https://stepmumspace.com/booking

Final Note

You are not alone.
You are not doing it wrong.
Your feelings are valid — and there is support that makes this feel lighter.

To join the Stepmum Space Workshop visit www.stepmumspace.com

Support the show

Send us a text

If you’re searching for stepmum help, stepmum support, or a real conversation about stepmum struggles and stepmum problems, this episode will speak straight to your heart.

In this emotional conversation, Katie talks with Nicole, a mum of two and stepmum of one, about the heartbreak of trying to co-parent when her stepson’s mum refuses to communicate — not just with her, but with her husband too.

Nicole shares how she’s navigated protecting her “ours babies” from the pain of not seeing their brother, and what it’s been like being cast as the villain in her stepson’s mum’s story.

Together, Katie and Nicole unpack why stepdads are so often glorified while stepmums are blamed for doing either too much or too little — and how that emotional double standard plays out in everyday life.

This honest chat is full of empathy, real-world insight, and moments that remind you: you’re not alone in the complexity of stepfamily life.

🌿 Reset Workshop Invitation - Stepmum Re-Set workshop | Stepmum Space

If today’s episode has resonated with you and you’re feeling ready for a reset before Christmas, join Katie for her Reset Workshop — a two-evening online experience created especially for stepmums who want to:
✨ Reconnect with their values
✨ Bring more calm and balance into family life
✨ Communicate and hold boundaries without guilt
✨ Feel more confident and at peace in their role

It’s a supportive, understanding space to learn, reflect, and connect with other stepmums who truly get it.

👉 Visit Stepmum Re-Set workshop | Stepmum Space
for all the details, and to explore downloadable workbooks if you prefer to work privately at your own pace head to All Products | Stepmum Space

Follow Stepmum Space for weekly conversations, expert stepmum support, and stories that help you feel seen and understood.

New episodes every week.
Take care — and sending lots of love,
Katie x

Support the show