In this episode Carolyn and Chris discuss another popular couples therapy approach the Gottman Method. Gottman outlines 4 horseman of the apocalypse that show up in couples relationships that spell disaster for the relationship. Carolyn and Chris break these down and look at what Gottman says and what EFT would say about these 4 horseman that are behaviors that show up in a relationship. This episode focuses on two of the horseman, defensiveness and stonewalling.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this Episode, Carolyn and Chris discuss when it may be difficult for you or your partner to take responsibility for their behavior in the negative cycle. They look at the possible reasons this may show up and how it prevents opportunities to connect and overcome your cycle.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this episode, Carolyn and Chris talk about blocks to connection that are seemingly out of your control. How do you respond with something in your relationship is creating distance and disconnection but you have little to now power to change it.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

Why do we keep secrets? Especially those that have to do with our sexuality or sexual expression? This is our first episode that may not be friendly for the car ride with your kids. We see it so often in our therapy offices, that one or both partners struggle with sexual secrets. We often justify the secret because it protects our partner, but are we really protecting ourselves from expected rejection. A difficult topic to be curious about for sure, and one that you may need the help of a therapist to flush out.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this episode, Carolyn and Chris address the common myth of “I need to work on myself” before I can do couples counseling. We hear this so often! While it is true that we all have our own issues that likely need to be worked out in therapy. Does that exclude us in benefiting from couples counseling before that happens? Chris and Carolyn try to bring some light to this and maybe bring some curiosity to this being a block for you to pursue couples therapy.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this episode, Carolyn and Chris return from a summer break to talk about what they do as therapists. Listen to learn more about what process they use for couples therapy in their offices as well as the workshops they offer and the opportunity to do an intensive with Carolyn. The many options for working on your relationship can sometimes be overwhelming or intimidating. Chris and Carolyn aim to demystify some of that and hopefully create curiosity about improving your relationship.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this episode Carolyn and Chris look at some blocks that we may not overcome. There are sometimes things that happen where the injury is too great, or trying to overcome the block may not be safe.

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/

In this episode Carolyn and Chris look at how validation as a block to connection. Validation is great and most people thrive on having their experience seen and heard. Sometimes giving validation can be difficult, especially when you don’t share the same experience of a situation. Can we be curious about validation and how we can validate another’s experience without invalidating our own?

Show Hosts:

Chris Wells: chris@aohcc.com

Carolyn Wenner: carolynwenner3@gmail.com

Workshops Hosted by Carolyn and Chris:

Created for Connection: https://www.carolynwenner.com/created-for-connection

Hold Me Tight: https://www.carolynwenner.com/hmt-workshop

EFT Resources:

Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/

Books by Sue Johnson: https://drsuejohnson.com/books/

International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT): https://iceeft.com/