Fosse, Fosse, Fosse! Martha Graham, Martha Graham! Don your wigs for sweet soulmates, subpar sons, and slimy senators. The person most confused by the film this week was: Calista Flockhart's Republican parents.

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If only we could switch place for... one ... day! Make a wish for moms on skateboards, daughters relaying the entire history of the Korean War, and a judgmental basset hound. The person most confused by the film this week was: every single character these women spoke to at any time during the film.

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Oh, baby! Put on your stretch pants for a movie full of caring parents, uptight couples, and extremely chill and socially well-adjusted teens. The person most confused by the film this week was: the science lab couple.

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Grab your notepads to pen tone-deaf tryouts, bumbling Brits, and wearisome writers. The person most confused by the film this week was: Cora's fanbase on the topic of appropriation.

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Throw your hands up if you know that you're a star! Harmonize for girl power, power struggles, and a power outage. The person most confused by the film this week was: Chanel's mom's credit card company.

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This is SO metaphorical! Come upstairs for fraudster families, creepy cake-interrupters, and sinister sub-basements. The person most confused by the film this week was: that teen who just wanted to kiss her tutor!

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Hey you guuuys! Join the hunt for an unfortunately formative film full of booby traps, tired tropes, and pirate-loving pals. The person most confused by the film this week was: science, re: how Sloth got like that.

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Skinny legends assemble! Make a wish for misremembered moaning, many Olde Bitch moments, and women hating womanhood (relatable). The person most confused by the film this week was: The billions of unicorns, still alive, in the sea?

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