Today we pick up right where we left off last week in my conversation with Heather Oden. In the previous episode, she introduced us to her son Jacob and shared the heartbreaking story of the car accident that took his life at just 15 years old. She also gave us a glimpse into those early days of grief and the ways God met her in the middle of unimaginable pain. (You may want to click HERE to listen to the first half of our conversation before continuing with today's episode!)

In this second half of our conversation, Heather opens up about the difficult journey of forgiveness for the driver who took her son’s life, the ways God has reminded her that He is near, and how her grief has evolved over the nearly ten years since Jacob went to heaven. She also shares the story behind her ministry, Light Up the Dark, and the beautiful truth that even after the death of Jacob, she still finds purpose in being his mom.

This is a conversation filled with hope ... a hope rooted not in circumstances, but in a God who is deeply personal, endlessly faithful, and always near. I believe you’ll be blessed by listening in.

Click HERE to connect with Heather and learn more about Light Up the Dark!

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

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Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

My guest today is Heather Oden of Sterling, Kansas. Heather is a woman who wears many hats ... She's the executive director of a nonprofit called Light Up the Dark, a worship leader at her church, the wife of a fifth-generation farmer, and the mom of five children. Today, she joins me to share the story of her son, Jacob.

Jacob was an athlete, an encourager, and a young man with a remarkable gift for noticing people who were hurting and speaking life into them. But on August 3, 2016, Jacob and his older brother, JJ, were driving home for lunch when their pickup was struck by a driver under the influence. JJ survived. Jacob did not.

In this first half of our conversation, Heather introduces us to Jacob and shares what those early days of grief were like after losing him so suddenly. She talks honestly about the shock, the questions she brought to God, and the unexpected ways God brought comfort in the midst of unimaginable pain.

This is a conversation filled with sorrow, certainly, but also with deep faith and the quiet reassurance that God is near to bring light to the darkness. I believe you'll be blessed by listening in.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

Is it possible to forgive someone who has taken everything from you?

That's the question at the heart of the second half of my conversation with Davey Blackburn.

After losing his wife, Amanda, and unborn daughter, Evie, in a tragic act of violence in 2015, Davey made national headlines when he publicly extended forgiveness to the men responsible. But as he explains in this episode, forgiveness was not a feeling that came naturally. It was a decision that was rooted in faith and continually renewed over time.

In this conversation, Davey shares how his understanding of forgiveness has evolved over the years and why he believes forgiveness is ultimately about trusting God with justice. He offers a perspective that is both challenging and freeing for those who have been deeply wounded by the actions of others.

We also explore the growth of Nothing Is Wasted Ministries, the organization that emerged from Davey's journey through grief. He reflects on what it means to steward pain well, how God can redeem suffering without minimizing it, and why our greatest impact often comes through simple obedience rather than grand plans.

Perhaps most encouraging is Davey's message to those who are still in the early stages of grief and simply cannot see any purpose in their pain. Rather than offering easy answers, he reminds us that healing is a process, faith is often borrowed from community, and God is patient with our questions.

This episode is filled with wisdom for anyone navigating loss, disappointment, trauma, or unanswered questions.

Listen to the first half of our conversation HERE!

Resources and Links:

• Nothing is Wasted Website
• Nothing Is Wasted Podcast
• Davey Blackburn's book: Nothing Is Wasted: A True Story of Hope, Forgiveness, and Finding Purpose in Pain
• Pain to Purpose Course

If this episode encouraged you, please share it with a friend and leave a review. Your support helps grieving parents discover hope and community through the While We're Waiting podcast.

Until next time, remember that while we're waiting, God is always at work.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

On November 10, 2015, Davey Blackburn's life changed forever.

What began as an ordinary Tuesday morning ended in unimaginable tragedy when intruders entered his home, leaving his wife Amanda critically wounded. 24 hours later, Davey faced the devastating reality of losing not only Amanda, but also their unborn daughter, Evie. Suddenly, the young pastor found himself walking a road he never expected to travel.

In this first half of our conversation, Davey shares the story of those heartbreaking days and the questions that followed. He reflects on the shock of loss, the challenge of caring for his young son Weston while grieving, and the unique pain of losing a child he never had the opportunity to meet ... a grief that's often overlooked.

We also talk about the spiritual wrestling that often accompanies tragedy. Davey speaks candidly about the questions he brought to God and the doubts he faced, and how he began working through them.

In This Episode

• Davey shares the events surrounding the loss of Amanda and their unborn daughter, Evie
• The emotional and spiritual shock that followed
• Single-parenting a young child while grieving profound loss
• The often-overlooked grief of losing an unborn child
• Wrestling with God when life doesn't make sense
• Finding reasons to keep moving forward in the midst of overwhelming sorrow

Resources & Links

• Nothing Is Wasted Ministries
• Nothing Is Wasted Podcast
• Davey Blackburn's book: Nothing Is Wasted: A True Story of Hope, Forgiveness, and Finding Purpose in Pain

Coming Next Week ...

In Part Two of our conversation, Davey shares his journey toward forgiveness, explains what it means to trust God with justice, and discusses how God transformed his deepest pain into a ministry that now helps thousands of people navigate loss, trauma, and suffering.

If this episode encouraged you, please share it with a friend and leave a review. Your support helps other grieving parents discover hope and community through the While We're Waiting podcast.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

"God just kept putting joy in front of me and encouraging me to open my heart to it."

In this second half of my conversation with author Leanne Davidson, we move into some of the deeper questions grieving parents often wrestle with after child loss: Why? What if? Could I have done something differently? Will I ever feel joy again?

After losing her son, Mikael, to a fentanyl overdose, Leanne has walked through those questions herself. With honesty and faith, she shares what she's learning about trusting God in the midst of unanswered questions, laying down guilt, and allowing joy back into a heart that has been forever changed.

Leanne also offers practical and compassionate wisdom for families and friends who want to support grieving parents well.

Together we discuss:

• Reconciling faith with unanswered questions
• Why choosing trust matters when we don't understand
• Guilt after child loss — especially after addiction-related loss
• The difference between conviction and guilt
• Navigating grief within families when everyone grieves differently
• Giving one another grace and changing expectations after loss
• What to do when you don't have the strength to pray or open your Bible
• The difference between happiness and lasting joy
• Leanne's idea of "joy bombs" and recognizing God's gifts in everyday moments
• Practical ways to support grieving parents
• How grief changes us and why there is no returning to "normal"
• The hope of heaven and seeing our children again

Throughout our conversation, Leanne continually points us back to God's faithfulness and His tender care for grieving parents. Her reminders are simple but powerful: God sees us, carries us, and remains near even when our hearts feel permanently changed.

Resources & Links:

• Listen to the first half of our conversation HERE.
• Visit Leanne Davidson's website HERE.
• A Beautiful Pain: Reflections of a Mother’s Journey of Grief
• Tattered Hearts & Hopeful Souls: A Christian Devotional for Grieving Hearts

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

“Our hearts may be tattered, but they are still useful in God’s hands.”

In this first half of my conversation with author Leanne Davidson, she shares the story of her son, Mikael — a compassionate, funny, energetic young man who loved people deeply and brought joy and laughter wherever he went. She also opens up about the difficult journey of walking alongside a child struggling with addiction and the devastating day her family lost Mikael to a fentanyl overdose in 2022.

Leanne speaks honestly about the complicated realities of addiction, the challenges families face along the way, and the ways God met her in the immediate aftermath of unimaginable loss. She also shares the heart behind her books A Beautiful Pain: Reflections of a Mother’s Journey of Grief and Tattered Hearts & Hopeful Souls: A Christian Devotional for Grieving Hearts.

Together we discuss:

• Mikael’s vibrant personality and the joy he brought to those around him
• Walking alongside a child battling addiction
• How addiction affected family relationships
• Establishing healthy boundaries while preserving connection
• The trauma and heartbreak of sudden loss
• The ways God carried Leanne through the earliest days of grief
• Why she chose the phrase “tattered hearts” for her devotional title
• Psalm 56:8 and the comfort of knowing God counts every tear
• The importance of lament and bringing our pain honestly before God

Leanne’s story is filled with sorrow, honesty, perseverance, and hope. If you are a grieving parent, especially one walking the unique path of addiction-related loss, I believe you will find comfort in her words and encouragement in her faith.

Resources & Links:

• Leanne Davidson’s website: A Mother's Grief Journey
• A Beautiful Pain: Reflections of a Mother’s Journey of Grief
• Tattered Hearts & Hopeful Souls: A Christian Devotional for Grieving Hearts

In next week’s episode, Leanne and I continue our conversation as we talk about guilt, unanswered questions, joy, supporting grieving families, and learning to live with a heart that has been forever changed. Be sure to come back for that!

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

Today's episode features the second half of my conversation with Matthew Efird, as we move beyond Noah’s earthly 57½ hours and into the difficult road of learning how to live after he went to Heaven. (If you missed the first half of our conversation, click HERE.)

Matthew shares candidly about grief from a father’s perspective, which is something that often goes unseen, particularly after the death of a baby. He talks about the tension of wanting to protect and fix what can't be fixed, the importance of having other men show up and simply be present, and the practical ways friends and community carried their family through the hardest days.

We also discuss the emotional fog of grief, learning to take life one moment at a time, and the delicate balance of worshiping and weeping simultaneously. Throughout the conversation, Matthew continually points back to the faith that sustained his family and the phrase that became their foundation: Even though… we will.

This episode is filled with wisdom for grieving parents, especially dads, as well as practical insight for anyone who wants to walk alongside hurting families in meaningful ways.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Grief from a father’s perspective
• Why dads often feel unseen after infant loss
• The importance of safe friendships and honest conversations
• Helpful ways men supported Matthew during grief
• Learning that “it’s okay to have a good day”
• Practical advice for grieving dads
• Why presence matters more than perfect words
• The meaning behind “worshiping and weeping” at the same time
• Taking grief one moment—and one step—at a time
• The role of community in surviving loss
• Common phrases to avoid when comforting grieving parents
• The heart behind Matthew’s book and the Even Though We Will Foundation

Resources & Links:

• Even Though We Will written by Matthew Efird
• Website & Foundation: https://eventhoughwewill.com/
  
  

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org

Matthew Efird and his wife, Hannah, were joyfully expecting their second son when the word "abnormalities" during a routine ultrasound changed everything. What followed was a journey into anticipatory grief after their son Noah was diagnosed with Trisomy 13, a condition often described as “incompatible with life.”

In today's episode, Matthew shares what it was like to walk through the remainder of the pregnancy with that knowledge—holding both hope and heartbreak at the same time. He talks about how he and Hannah navigated those months together, how they learned to communicate in the middle of grief, and the intentional ways they chose to spend their time with Noah before he was born.

Matthew also shares about Noah’s birth and the unexpected gift of 57½ hours together — time to hold him, to introduce him to family, and to fully experience what it meant to parent their son on this side of heaven.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The joy of expecting a second child after a season of waiting
• The moment everything changed at a routine ultrasound
• Processing the word “abnormalities” and a Trisomy 13 diagnosis
• Walking through anticipatory grief during pregnancy
• How Matthew and Hannah supported each other in their marriage
• Two simple but powerful questions that helped them communicate in grief
• Choosing to be intentional with the time they had with Noah
• Noah’s birth and the gift of 57½ hours together
• What it meant to parent Noah during his brief life

Be sure to join us next week for the second half of this conversation, when Matthew shares what life looked like after Noah’s passing and offers insight into grief from a father’s perspective.

Resources & Links:

• Matthew’s book: Even Though We Will
• Website: https://eventhoughwewill.com/
  
  

If this episode resonated with you, we invite you to share it with someone who may need encouragement today.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the show. Click here to send me a message! (Though I read every message, I am unable to respond through this format.)

** IMPORTANT** - All views expressed by guests on this podcast are theirs alone, and may not represent the Statement of Faith and Statement of Beliefs of the While We're Waiting ministry.

We'd love for you to connect with us here at While We're Waiting!

Click HERE to visit our website and learn about our free While We're Waiting Weekends for bereaved parents

Click HERE to learn more about our network of While We're Waiting support groups all across the country.

Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel

Click HERE to follow our public Facebook page

Click HERE to follow us on Instagram

Click HERE to follow us on Twitter

Click HERE to make a tax-deductible donation to the While We're Waiting ministry

Contact Jill by email at: jill@whilewerewaiting.org