In this powerful episode of The School of Resilience, Dr. Maria Bargeman delves into the common belief that full healing from trauma is impossible. She discusses the origins of this mindset, often rooted in environmental influences and past experiences, such as messages from clinicians, group therapy dynamics, and personal histories of emotional pain. Dr. Bargeman emphasizes how these factors can shape a person’s belief that healing isn’t achievable, especially when reinforced by authority figures or repeated exposure to narratives of ongoing struggle.

Dr. Bargeman explains that beliefs about our inability to heal often serve a protective function, shielding us from the repeated heartbreak of failed attempts at recovery. Some individuals may also cling to their identity as someone who suffers because it feels familiar and safe. This attachment to a painful narrative can feel necessary to preserve the validity of their past experiences, making the idea of healing seem like an erasure of what they’ve endured. Dr. Bargeman compassionately addresses how these beliefs, while understandable, can keep individuals stuck in a cycle of suffering.

As the episode progresses, Dr. Bargeman encourages listeners to gently untangle their sense of self from their painful experiences, recognizing that holding onto the past doesn’t change it but does impact their present and future. She highlights the importance of validating these beliefs with compassion rather than dismissing them outright. Through understanding and reframing our origin stories, we can start to cultivate a new narrative of hope and healing. Dr. Maria Bargeman, a seasoned trauma recovery specialist, is dedicated to empowering individuals to reclaim their lives. Learn more about her work at mariabargeman.com.

1. Beliefs About Healing: The belief that full healing from trauma is impossible often stems from environmental influences and past experiences, reinforced by authority figures and exposure to negative narratives.
2. Protective Identity: Many hold onto the belief they cannot heal because it serves as a protective mechanism, offering a sense of safety and validation for their past, even if it keeps them stuck in suffering.
3. Path to Reframing: Dr. Maria Bargeman advocates for gently validating and reframing these beliefs with compassion, creating emotional distance from past experiences to allow for a new, hopeful narrative of healing and empowerment.

00:00 The Possibility of Healing from Trauma

03:22 Understanding the Roots of Healing Beliefs

09:09 The Importance of Origin Stories in Healing