エピソード

  • # 394 Staying True to You
    2026/10/12
    Are you teaching your teen to be themselves—or unintentionally pressuring them to become who you think they should be? As moms, we want our teens to be confident, authentic, and true to their values. But what happens when their values clash with ours? How do we help them fit in without losing themselves? And how do we stay true to ourselves while protecting our relationship with our teens? In this episode of Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens, I talk with Dr. Patricia Hewlin, author of Staying True to You: Unlock the Power of Your Middle Self and Live with Confidence, Integrity, and Peace of Mind. Dr. Hewlin challenges the popular advice to "just be yourself" and introduces the concept of the middle self—finding a healthy balance between authenticity and conformity. She explains why being authentic isn't always helpful, why fitting in isn't always bad, and how knowing our core values helps us make wiser choices in our relationships. We explore how moms can unintentionally impose their own values on their teens, especially around achievement, friendships, college choices, and independence. Dr. Hewlin encourages moms to practice "vigilant curiosity" instead of reacting to resistance. When our teens push back, they may be protecting something deeply important to them. By asking better questions, we can discover what matters most to our teens instead of assuming we already know. You'll also learn the three essential practices for developing your middle self: introspection, discernment, and temperance. These skills help both moms and teens recognize their non-negotiables, avoid unhealthy extremes, regulate their emotions, and build relationships based on mutual respect. Instead of simply telling our teens to "be yourself," Dr. Hewlin encourages us to help them "be your empowered self." Three Key Takeaways Authenticity and conformity aren't all-or-nothing. Being true to yourself doesn't mean saying everything you think, and fitting in doesn't mean losing yourself. The middle self allows you to honor your values while respecting others. Get curious about your teen's resistance. When your teen pushes back, ask what value may feel threatened. Their need for autonomy, connection, or individuality may be different from yours. Understanding their values can transform conflict into connection. Model the middle self. Practice introspection to know your values, discernment to understand what a situation requires, and temperance to regulate your responses. When moms learn to navigate these tensions, they give their teens the tools to do the same. Follow at https://www.instagram.com/patriciahewlin/ Learn More at: https://patriciahewlin.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    41 分
  • #393 Is Anxiety Driving Your Parenting?
    2026/10/05
    What if the very thing you think makes you a good mom—worrying about your teen—is actually getting in the way of the relationship you want with them? In this episode, I talk with licensed professional counselor and anxiety and OCD expert Jenna Overbaugh about the difference between normal parental concern and letting anxiety take over your parenting. Jenna explains why motherhood can be the perfect breeding ground for anxiety: we worry most about what we deeply care about, feel responsible for, and ultimately cannot control. The problem comes when worry stops being constructive and starts driving our decisions. Instead of asking, “What could go wrong?” Jenna encourages moms to ask, “Is this constructive?” and focus on what they can actually do in the present moment. We also explore intrusive thoughts, rumination, and the ways anxiety can spill over into our relationships with our teens. When fear is running the show, moms may overthink, seek reassurance, micromanage, or make parenting decisions based primarily on preventing something bad from happening. Jenna offers a powerful image: imagine fear sitting at a conference table alongside your values, logic, instincts, and what you know to be true. Fear deserves a seat—but it doesn't get to run the meeting. And because our teens are watching how we respond to uncertainty, modeling a healthy relationship with anxiety can be one of the most important lessons we give them. Finally, we talk about accepting one of the hardest truths of parenting: we cannot control the outcome. We can do many things “right” and still face uncertainty, disappointment, or struggle. Instead of trying to engineer the perfect future for our teens, Jenna encourages moms to return to the present, tolerate uncertainty, and think about what will matter five years from now—not just what will relieve our anxiety in the next five minutes. Sometimes the healthiest choice is to put down the college application, the problem, or the worry and protect the relationship. Anxiety can come along for the ride, but it doesn't get to drive the bus. 3 Takeaways Ask, “Is this constructive?” Worrying and problem-solving are not the same thing. If your thoughts are simply circling the problem, come back to the present and ask what useful action you can take right now. Let fear have a voice, not the final vote. Consider your anxiety, but also listen to your values, logic, instincts, and what you know about your teen before making parenting decisions. Parent with the relationship in mind. You cannot eliminate uncertainty or guarantee your teen's future. Think beyond what will ease your anxiety for the next five minutes and choose what supports you, your teen, and your relationship for the next five years. Learn More at : https://jennaoverbaughlpc.com/ Follow at: https://www.instagram.com/jenna.overbaugh/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    44 分
  • #392 College Applications Without the Drama
    2026/09/28
    Are college applications creating more stress, anxiety, and conflict in your home than they need to? The college application process can feel overwhelming for both teens and parents. In this episode, I talk with Dr. Jill Constantino, author of The People’s Guide to College Applications: A Week-by-Week Approach to Writing, Connecting, and Getting In. Jill is a writer, college coach, former Harvard writing instructor and dean, and a mom of four. She brings a refreshing message to families: your teen doesn’t need to have their entire future figured out—and they don’t need to manufacture the “perfect” version of themselves to get into college. Jill shares practical strategies to help teens get unstuck, especially when they freeze or procrastinate over college essays. Instead of starting with the pressure to write an amazing essay, she encourages teens to make lists about what they love, what matters to them, and experiences that have shaped them. From there, they can use short, imperfect writing exercises to uncover the stories and details that reveal who they really are. The goal isn’t to sound impressive—it’s to sound authentic. We also explore the delicate role parents play during this stressful season. Too much pushing can damage the relationship, but completely stepping away may leave teens without the support they still need. Jill encourages parents to find the middle ground: stay involved, ask thoughtful questions, offer support, and remember that your teen’s journey belongs to them. Ultimately, the college application process can become more than a race to get accepted—it can be an opportunity to understand your teen more deeply, protect your relationship, and help them discover who they are becoming. 3 Takeaways Your teen doesn’t have to have it all figured out. At 16, 17, or 18, they are still discovering who they are, what interests them, and what they may want from their future. Authenticity matters more than trying to impress. Encourage your teen to notice the quirky, ordinary, specific details of their life. Those details can reveal far more about who they are than an essay designed to sound perfect. Support without taking over. Your teen still needs you during the college application process—but they need you as a supportive presence, not as the person controlling the outcome. Keep the relationship in mind as you help them navigate this transition. Learn More at: https://www.tangledbeings.com/ Follow at: https://www.instagram.com/tangledbankfarm/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    51 分
  • # 391 Are You Raising a Leader?
    2026/09/20
    Are you raising your teen to follow directions—or are you helping them become someone others want to follow? In this episode of Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens, I talk with Dr. Pam Manfredo-Curtis, author of The Origin of a Leader: Transforming Family Patterns into Leadership Power. Pam shares a fascinating idea: our earliest experiences at home shape how we communicate, handle conflict, build relationships, and ultimately lead. And because our kids are learning these skills first from us, developing leadership in our teens starts with looking at what we are modeling at home. We explore the difference between dictating and influencing. When moms are afraid—afraid our teen will fail, make a bad choice, or get hurt—it's easy to move into telling, correcting, and lecturing. But Pam explains that leadership grows when we create emotional safety, listen with empathy, stay curious about our teen's perspective, and give them opportunities to think for themselves. Sometimes the most powerful question isn't, “How do I get my teen to do this?” but “Why are they showing up this way?” We also talk about the importance of pacing—knowing when to push and when to pause. Moms often feel pressure to address everything immediately, but our teens don't need one big mother lecture; they need thousands of small conversations over time. When we calm ourselves, listen, and connect our guidance to what our teens want for their own lives, we move from controlling their behavior to helping them develop confidence, self-agency, and genuine leadership. 3 Takeaways Leadership starts at home. Your teen is learning how to communicate, handle conflict, listen, and influence others by watching how you do it. Trade dictating for curiosity. Instead of immediately telling your teen what to do, ask: What do you think? Why is this important to you? How do you think you should handle this? Know when to pause. You don't have to teach every lesson in the moment. Creating emotional safety and choosing the right timing can make your influence far more powerful. Follow at https://www.instagram.com/pammanfredocurtis/ Learn More at: https://www.manfredocurtis.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    38 分
  • # 390 Boys Adrift: Why Are Boys Struggling?
    2026/09/14
    Why are so many bright, capable boys becoming unmotivated, disengaged from school, and more interested in the virtual world than real life? In this eye-opening episode of Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens, I talk with Dr. Leonard Sax about the newly released third edition of his bestselling book, Boys Adrift: The Six Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men. Dr. Sax explores why so many boys are struggling academically and losing motivation—and how changes in education may be contributing to the problem. We also dive into the powerful pull of video games and why parents need to pay attention to both how much their sons are gaming and what they are playing. Dr. Sax discusses sleep, ADHD, and stimulant medications and encourages parents to ask informed questions. His message is clear: teens still need parents to provide boundaries, structure, and guidance, even when they push back. Finally, we tackle some of the newest challenges facing boys: pornography, AI girlfriends and companions, and the online “manosphere.” Dr. Sax explains how these influences can pull boys away from real relationships and a meaningful life. He encourages parents to monitor technology, create firm limits, and connect boys with positive male role models. Most importantly, he reminds parents that these problems are not hopeless—there are concrete steps we can take to help our boys thrive. 3 Takeaways Pay attention to the virtual world. Know what your son is doing online and make sure gaming, pornography, and AI aren't replacing sleep, school, friendships, and real-life experiences. Have the courage to set limits. Your son may not like your boundaries, but he still needs you to provide structure and guidance that protects his future. Help him see what a good man looks like. Boys need positive male role models who demonstrate character, responsibility, respect, purpose, and healthy relationships. Learn More at: https://www.leonardsax.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    56 分
  • # 389 The Impact of Anxiety on Families
    2026/09/07
    Do you spend a significant time worrying about all things, especially your kids. Anxiety is sneaky and gets inside your head. It convinces you that you are being a good mom if you worry and that you are a bad mom if you don't. It deceives you into thinking that worrying and obsessing is productive and will lead to problem solving. The truth is anxiety is exhausting and is a huge reason we can feel all mothered out. To talk about this I brought in a knowledgeable guest. ⁠Lynn Lyons, LICSW⁠ has been psychotherapist for 25 years and specializes in treating anxious children and their parents, with a special interest in interrupting the generational pattern of worry in families. Lynn has a podcast called, ⁠Flusterclux⁠, where she helps parents understand how to manage anxiety. Katie Couric has also interviewed Lynn, and she has been featured in Psychology Today, The New York Times, NPR and Reader's Digest. Her new book, ⁠The Anxiety Audit⁠ offers an eye-opening look at the 7 sneaky ways that anxiety and worry weave their way into our families, our friendships, and our jobs, and provides actionable steps to reverse the cycle and reclaim our emotional well-being. ⁠ https://www.instagram.com/lynnlyonsanxiety/ ⁠ ⁠https://www.lynnlyons.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    49 分
  • #388 The Reward Trap: Are Rewards Killing Motivation?
    2026/08/31
    What if the rewards you’re using to motivate your teen are actually making them less motivated? In this episode of Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens, I talk with Dr. Özgür Bolat, author of The Reward Trap: Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science of Motivating Kids, about the surprising downside of using rewards to motivate our kids. Dr. Bolat is a distinguished education scientist, researcher, associate professor, and internationally recognized expert in education and parenting. He earned his master’s degree from Harvard Graduate School of Education and his PhD from the University of Cambridge and spent a year as a visiting PhD student at MIT Sloan. His research and personal experience led him to explore how achievement, praise, and rewards can create a dependence on external validation—and what parents can do differently. Dr. Bolat explains that while rewards may get teens to do what we want in the short term, compliance is not the same as motivation. When we say, “Get an A and I’ll give you money,” or “Finish your homework and you can have more screen time,” teens may become focused on the payoff rather than learning, mastery, or personal responsibility. Over time, rewards can undermine intrinsic motivation and even affect creativity, self-esteem, and connection. Instead of immediately trying to control behavior, Dr. Bolat encourages parents to get curious about what’s underneath it. Why isn’t your teen studying? Why have they stopped caring about school? What are they struggling with? His PEACE model helps parents move away from simply fixing the behavior and toward understanding and solving the deeper problem together. 3 Takeaways for Moms 1. Compliance is not the same as motivation.Rewards may get your teen to do something today, but they don't necessarily build the internal motivation to keep doing it. Ask yourself: Am I trying to get immediate compliance, or am I helping my teen develop ownership? 2. Look underneath the behavior.Instead of asking, “How do I get my teen to study?” get curious: “Why is my teen struggling to study?” Resistance may be pointing to discouragement, disconnection, fear of failure, lack of meaning, or another deeper issue. 3. Help your teen find a cause, not just a goal.Grades and college acceptance may not be motivating enough. Talk with your teen about the bigger picture: What kind of life do you want? What are you good at? What matters to you? How do you want to contribute? Meaning, growth, values, and connection can become powerful internal motivators. Follow on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/dr.ozgurbolat/ Learn more at: https://ozgurbolat.co.uk/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    30 分
  • # 387 Teens: What's Going On Under the Surface?
    2026/08/24
    What if your teen’s defiance, withdrawal, lying, or disrespect isn’t actually the problem—but a signal that something deeper is going on beneath the surface? Geoffrey Owen is the founder of Biologically Aligned Parenting and author of The Parenting Assumption. Drawing on decades of observation, his background in theater, the influence of The Continuum Concept, and his own experience raising two daughters, Geoffrey helps parents move away from managing and controlling behavior and instead understand the deeper needs that may be driving it. His approach encourages parents to create an environment of greater calm, safety, connection, and trust so children can mature and thrive. When your teen is rude, defiant, withdrawn, or dishonest, it’s natural to focus on stopping the behavior. But what if there’s another way to look at it? In this episode of Power Your Parenting: Moms with Teens, I talk with Geoffrey Owen about his concept of Biologically Aligned Parenting. Geoffrey encourages parents to view difficult behavior not simply as something to correct, but as a signal that a child may be reacting to something in their environment or an unmet need for connection, safety, certainty, and trust. We explore how easily moms can get caught in a cycle of monitoring, questioning, correcting, and trying harder—especially when we’re worried about our teens. Geoffrey suggests that sometimes doing less can actually create more connection. Instead of immediately reacting to the behavior, parents can become curious about what might be underneath it and pay attention to the emotional atmosphere they themselves are creating. We also talk about how parental stress and anxiety can affect the entire household. When moms are constantly rushing, worrying, questioning, or trying to manage every detail, teens may experience that pressure even when our intentions are loving. One of the most powerful shifts we can make is to work on our own state—our anxiety, frustration, tone, and reactions—rather than putting all our energy into changing our teen. Geoffrey also offers a provocative idea for moms who feel shut out by their teens: stop filling every space with questions and conversation. Give your teen room to initiate. Focus on your own life, interests, and well-being, and allow some space in the relationship. As we discuss from our own experiences with our daughters, sometimes when moms stop chasing the details, teens and young adults become more willing to share them. This conversation offers moms permission to step away from exhausting over-management and consider a different question: Instead of asking, “How do I make my teen change?” ask, “What can I change in myself and in our environment that might make connection easier?” 3 Key Takeaways 1. Look beneath the behavior. Instead of immediately labeling your teen as disrespectful, defiant, lazy, or difficult, get curious. Geoffrey suggests viewing behavior as a signal and asking what may be happening underneath it. 2. Your calm matters more than you think. You may not be able to control your teen’s mood or choices, but you can pay attention to your own anxiety, frustration, tone, and reactions. A calmer parent can help create a calmer and more secure home environment. 3. Sometimes less parenting creates more connection. Fewer questions, less monitoring, and less chasing can create the space teens need to come toward you. Listen more, manage less, invest in your own life, and give your teen opportunities to initiate connection. Learn more at: https://geoffreyowen.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    41 分