This episode is not about motivation. It’s about ownership.

Rob McCarthy got tired of hating the person he saw in the mirror and decided to stop living a life that wasn’t his. In this raw, unfiltered conversation, Rob breaks down how we inherit scripts from family, society, debt, and social media, and how those scripts quietly run our lives until we’re willing to confront them.

We talk about small wins, fear, comparison, money, self-help lies, faith, discipline, and why real change doesn’t come from quotes or manifesting, but from brutal honesty and consistent action. If you’re done pretending and ready to take responsibility for your life, this episode will hit hard in the best way.

04:00 – Rob’s breaking point: hating the person in the mirror

06:45 – Living a life designed by everyone else

09:20 – Why most people care too much about opinions that don’t matter

12:10 – Criticism, fear, and releasing the book quietly

15:00 – Auditing your circle and cutting dead weight

18:30 – The biggest lies sold by the self-help industry

22:00 – Why motivation quotes don’t change lives

25:10 – Fear, excuses, and calling yourself out

29:30 – Debt, consumption, and financing self-worth

33:00 – Redefining success on your own terms

36:40 – Social media, comparison, and the modern “Colosseum”

40:30 – Faith, work, and personal responsibility

44:45 – Small wins and why they matter more than big goals

48:30 – “You don’t need a miracle. You need a mirror.”

51:30 – What to do when you don’t know where to start

55:00 – Where to find Rob’s book, podcast, and resources

✨Connect with Rob McCarthy:

• Book: F the Script: How to Own Your Sh*t and Rewrite Your Story
• Available on Amazon
• Podcast: F the Standard
• Stand Store: https://stan.store/fts25

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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This conversation with Tonya Peck is one of those episodes that hits you in the chest in the best way possible. Tonya grew up in chaos, carried shame that never belonged to her, and spent years trying to outrun the emotional imprint of feeling unwanted. Her turning point came when she discovered the power of the Primal Question; the single emotional need that shapes how we love, lead, react, and relate.

Now she’s a Primal Question Coach, a longtime healthcare professional, and a fitness instructor who teaches women how to break belief barriers and finally step into their God-given gifts. This episode dives into healing, identity, faith, emotional awareness, and why small shifts can change the entire direction of a life. It's honest, hopeful, and incredibly human.

04:40 — Tonya’s journey from a chaotic childhood to becoming a coach

08:10 — Teen pregnancy, loss, and the years she carried silent shame

13:05 — The moment she realized her story could help someone else

17:20 — What the seven Primal Questions are and why they matter

22:45 — Identifying your dominant emotional need

27:10 — Breaking belief barriers and stepping out of comfort zones

32:00 — How physical health ties directly to emotional healing

36:50 — Faith, forgiveness, and rebuilding self-worth

41:30 — Leadership, community, and accountability

45:40 — What Tonya wishes every woman knew about her own strength

50:00 — How to start healing your story today

✨Connect with Tonya Peck:

• Website: https://motionandmindset.com/
• Instagram: @motionandmindset

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele sits down with Rachel Sachs, co-director of The Marriage School. Rachel and her husband Daniel went from newlywed chaos and emotional disconnect to rebuilding their marriage with tools that actually work, not theories, not quick fixes, real skills.

Rachel shares how they hit a breaking point after having kids, how their six-month program gave them a new foundation, and why so many couples think they’re failing when really, they’re just under-equipped. She talks about humility, communication, faith, the importance of community, and why genuine change only happens when both partners stop pointing fingers and start doing the work.

If you’ve ever wished relationships came with a manual, this episode is your sign that help exists, and there’s nothing wrong with needing support.

 00:02:10 – Rachel’s background: opera singer turned marriage educator

 00:06:10 – The moment Rachel and Daniel realized they needed help

 00:10:10 – “We realized we loved each other, but we didn’t know how to do marriage.”

 00:14:10 – What The Marriage School is and why it works

 00:18:10 – The pressure on couples after having kids

 00:22:10 – Why emotional skills aren’t taught, and what happens when they are

 00:26:10 – “No one ever changes when you point the finger at them.”

 00:30:10 – Communication, humility, community, and real transformation

 00:35:10 – How couples can start making shifts today

✨Connect with Rachel Sachs:

• Website: https://www.themarriageschool.org
• Programs & Workshops info: Available through their site

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

💬 Rate & Review

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In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele talks with Alan Lazaros, speaker, coach, and co-host of the global top 100 podcast Next Level University. At 26, Alan survived a head-on collision that became the wake-up call he didn’t know he needed. It forced him to face the trauma, insecurity, and people-pleasing patterns that shaped his life and pushed him into a deeper, more meaningful kind of personal growth.

Alan breaks down his “four buckets of life,” how external success can hide deep internal emptiness, and why fulfillment requires honesty, consistency, and a willingness to look inward. He talks openly about trauma responses, the pressure to be “enough,” and the challenge of aligning your purpose with what the world actually pays for.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or like you’ve outgrown the life you’re living, this conversation gives you clarity, courage, and practical insight on what real transformation looks like.

 00:02:20 – Alan’s early life, loss, and the roots of his trauma responses

 00:07:20 – The car accident that changed everything

 00:12:20 – From externally successful to internally empty

 00:16:20 – Discovering personal development and questioning everything

 00:20:20 – The four “buckets” of life and where people get stuck

 00:25:20 – Trauma, insecurity, and why people stay in the wrong identity

 00:30:20 – Aligning purpose with your real strengths

 00:35:20 – Building fulfillment: habits, metrics, and self-awareness

 00:40:20 – What real growth feels like over time

✨Connect with Alan Lazarus:

• Website: https://www.nextleveluniverse.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/
• Podcast: Next Level University

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess, Michele talks with Melissa Kramer, founder of Live UTI Free, a global patient-led initiative reshaping how urinary tract infections and pelvic health are understood and treated.

After years of chronic UTIs, misdiagnosis, and dismissal, Melissa transformed her pain into purpose. She built one of the world’s most respected patient advocacy and research platforms, connecting medical professionals, researchers, and patients around the world.

Melissa shares how she went from being unheard to leading a movement for better science, better care, and more compassionate healthcare. This conversation shines a light on the gender gap in medicine, the power of lived experience, and how advocacy can grow from the most personal places.

If you’ve ever been dismissed by the medical system or felt like no one was listening, Melissa’s story will help you find your voice again.

•  [00:02:15] Melissa’s story: from chronic UTI sufferer to advocate
•  [00:07:15] Why women’s symptoms are often minimized or misunderstood
•  [00:12:15] The founding of Live UTI Free and the power of community research
•  [00:17:15] How to advocate for yourself in the doctor’s office
•  [00:22:15] The emotional and physical toll of chronic illness
•  [00:27:15] What real progress looks like in women’s health
•  [00:32:15] Building bridges between patients, science, and policy
•  [00:37:15] Finding hope through purpose and shared experience
•  [00:42:15] Closing thoughts: breaking stigma and driving change

✨Connect with Melissa Kramer:

• Website: https://liveutifree.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/liveutifree/#
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissa-kramer-93714224/

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess, Michele talks with Doris Efford, a writer, speaker, and coach who helps women reclaim identity, self-worth, and emotional wholeness. Doris opens up about growing up disconnected from her true self, performing for approval, and the moment she realized she had to stop living for everyone else and start living honestly. She shares what identity healing actually looks like, why self-worth is at the core of change, and how faith, grace, and emotional resilience brought her back to herself.

This episode is for anyone who has ever felt invisible, unworthy, or stuck in survival mode.

00:02:10 Doris’s early story and losing herself to expectations

00:06:10 Identity, survival mode, and faith during hardship

00:10:10 “Motivation isn’t enough” – why habits need a deeper why

00:13:10 Self-worth and why people don’t choose themselves

00:16:10 What healing actually looked like for Doris

00:20:10 People-pleasing, shame, and being honest with yourself

00:25:10 The role of God, grace, and emotional maturity

00:30:10 How to stop performing and start being present in your life

00:35:10 Final thoughts — identity, love, and choosing truth

✨Connect with Doris Efford:

· Email: hello@promptedcollective.com

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele talks with Dana Sherwin, a healthcare executive turned patient advocate, who brings over 35 years of experience in healthcare administration, and a deeply personal story of survival. After facing a life-threatening illness and undergoing a stem cell transplant, Dana gained a rare perspective: what it’s like to move from managing care systems to navigating them as a patient.

She shares what it truly means to take ownership of your health, from asking the right questions and building stronger communication with your providers, to organizing your own care and advocating for yourself when it matters most. Dana’s message is clear: you are the CEO of your own health.

This episode is both practical and deeply human. It’s for anyone who’s ever felt lost in the medical system, overwhelmed by a diagnosis, or ready to take a more active role in their wellbeing.

 [00:02:25] Dana’s journey from healthcare executive to patient

 [00:06:25] The day everything changed

 [00:10:25] Facing fear and finding strength through uncertainty

 [00:14:25] How to communicate effectively with your doctor

 [00:18:25] Becoming your own advocate in a complex system

 [00:22:25] Coordinating your care and building a support team

 [00:27:25] What it means to be prepared before a crisis hits

 [00:33:25] Lessons from both sides of the healthcare system

 [00:38:25] Finding gratitude and growth through survival

 [00:43:25] Final reflections on courage, hope, and advocacy

✨Connect with Dana Sherwin:

· Email: dana.sherwin@gmail.com

· Resource: The Journal of Patient Experience (Open Access)

· LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/desherwin/

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

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In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele talks with Nisha Srivastava, the Director of Pilates Manchester & Northwest Pilates & Yoga Centre, who brings over 30 years of experience in movement, mindfulness, and holistic health.

Nisha shares her story of how physical and emotional healing are deeply connected, and how true wellness begins when we stop ignoring the signals our bodies send us. From her own challenges with stress and imbalance to decades of helping others, she explains why we can’t separate the body from the mind, and how awareness, breath, and self-compassion can transform both.

This conversation dives into what stress really does to the body, how to move through it with intention, and why slowing down is often the most powerful medicine of all. Nisha also leaves listeners with simple, practical tools to restore balance, whole foods, clean water, breathwork, and rest.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected, exhausted, or out of rhythm, this episode is a reminder that healing doesn’t have to be complicated, it just has to be honest.

 [00:02:20] Nisha’s journey from dancer to holistic healer

 [00:06:20] How Pilates and yoga helped her rebuild from burnout

 [00:10:20] The connection between emotions and physical health

 [00:14:20] When the body whispers—and when it starts to scream

 [00:18:20] The cost of pushing through stress

 [00:23:20] How awareness creates space for healing

 [00:28:20] The power of breath as the body’s first medicine

 [00:33:20] Releasing perfection and returning to balance

 [00:38:20] Simple, everyday habits that build real wellness

 [00:43:20] Final thoughts on self-love, presence, and rest

✨Connect with Nisha Srivastava:

· Website: https://www.pilatesmanchester.co.uk

· Studio: Northwest Pilates & Yoga Centre

· Instagram: @northwestpilates

✨ Connect with Michele Simms:

• Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
• Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
• LinkedIn: Michele Simms
• Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Podcast

#TheBeautyInTheMess #NishaSrivastava #HolisticHealing #MindBodyConnection #WellnessJourney #Pilates #HealingFromWithin #SelfAwareness #AuthenticLiving

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